Thursday, 7 February 2013

Everybody Knows but No-one Really Knows

The Christian struggle is one like no other. It's like im always fighting to stay on top almost as if I unlearn everything I learn in church by Monday, as if I erease from memory everything I read during devotions, as if delete the existence of God when my day starts. There is no battle that's harder to win, there is no fight that wounds you more, there is no war that has more risks involved than the war of the Christian. I struggle daily with myslef, fighting against my own nature, the very essence of my sinful being, because I am  a christian. Its almost as if with every trial with every temptation,  I will always be a freshman, I will always be rookie because I dont learn from my mistakes I dont gain experience nothing, I just fall again, I just fail Him again.......... like this 5000th encounter was my first time. I  can feel Satan laughing in my face everytime I slip and fall, honestly it feels like I spend more time on the floor than anywhere else because sometimes when I fall I dont even bother to pick myself up because I see myself as unworthy. I dont see myself the way my bible tells me Jesus sees me. I dont see myself as the child of the king, I dont even see my self as the servant of the King because for even that task I am  not worthy.  Everytime my saviour and I are in a good place its as if the earth opens and swallows me up immedeatly seperating me from my God, but are we ever truly seperated from God? because my bible tells me that in the deepest darkest cornera of the ocean, in the darkest of time which ever botemless pit I happen to find myself at the bottom of today, whereever I am God is there. Why is he there? why does he keep fighting for me? why does keep an endless supply of mercy... just for me? why does he care? Why does he wake me up every morning, why doesn't he hit me with deadly diseases and end my existance on earth because THAT I do deserve. If God were man I would call Him stupid, I would call Him niave, but thats just it isnt it. God is not man. His ways are not our ways, His thought patterns, His sytem of thought His understanding is on differnt level from ours. For some reason He loves me and no the fact that he created me isnt good enough from my point of veiw. There is some unknown connection between me and God, between us and God, between you and God that makes Him manifest this unconditional ...out of this world love which the human nature cannot comprehend that makes Him love you and me inspite of... [ insert your load of crap here]... there's nothing else to say but... Jesus    loves   you..... but you got to look at that word love in a different way.... not Jesus wants to buy you chocolate or Jesus wants to give you roses or Jesus wants to Marry you but Jesus gives you life even though you curse him with it, Jesus stands here and gives chance after chance after chance even though He knows your going to let him down again, Jesus gives you clothes and food even though you betray almost every day, Jesus gives you everything even when we give nothing back. Who is this Jesus really? I want to know more about Him I driven to explore and understand His character because it truly is a phenomenon  This concept of unconditional love, this continuous giving without reciprocation is a phenomenon. This Jesus can be found Here :

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